Insightful Study

I'm pretty sure my wife was part of the study.

5 Deadly Terms

 

I hear these words a lot.  Now I understand.

What is Stalking?

I don't like romance, so this does not affect me.

Let's Play Fetch

I think that dog would love to play fetch with herself.

Girl on Fire

I'm not a marketing genius, but I think Alicia would have sold some tubes.

What's your mood today?

Seems legit.

"Naked"

Relax mom...she's just naked.

What's better than a Swiffer?

Both are good gifts.

Can you txt me...Verizon?

Grandparents were not so happy.

7 Ways to Ask for Sex

1.  Would you like a back rub?

2.  Let's spend some "quality time" together.

3.  Kids are finally down for the night.  Are you ready to get "down" for the night?

4.  I cooked and cleaned and did the dishes. 

5. Don't you want to try some stuff from "50 shades?"

6.  Hey girl...tell me about all about that sale at Target.

7.  Here's my bonus check.  Why don't you "check out my bonus?"

Secret of Happiness

Pick carefully.

Brillant Ad

I need some douche lessons.

Nice Moustache

 

Don't be offended, I like furry animals.

Private lecture

 

I get a lecture at all times of the day.

Safe Asians

Is it racist if it's true and funny??

Story Time is Over

I don't think we will get to hear the rest of the story.